sigel phoenix
female
seventeen
chinese
u.s.a.


moenokori
off the wall


800x600+ res, msie 5.0+
seno alice and wakamiya kyou from alice 19th by watase yuu, images from fantasy land and lyrics from nagai aida by kiroro and i for you by luna sea


valhalla
which way is up?
la chute
freely will do
lovesealed
whispers in blindness
riven's blog
freetalk
lime rain
randomaundering
ayuru's blog
tsubasa
clara's livejournal
sasayaku
spent casings
kielle's livejournal
slap to the head
bishounen diaries
bishoujo diaries
yaoiland


2/03/02 - 2/16/02
1/20/02 - 2/02/02
1/04/02 - 1/16/02
12/18/01 - 1/02/02
12/04/01 - 12/16/01
11/18/01 - 12/03/01
11/03/01 - 11/15/01
10/19/01 - 11/01/01
9/28/01 - 10/18/01
9/06/01 - 9/27/01
8/22/01 - 9/05/01
8/04/01 - 8/21/01
7/21/01 - 8/03/01
7/07/01 - 7/20/01
6/18/01 - 7/06/01
5/18/01 - 6/17/01
5/03/01 - 5/16/01
4/22/01 - 5/02/01
4/08/01 - 4/20/01
3/23/01 - 4/06/01
3/05/01 - 3/21/01
2/19/01 - 3/01/01
2/10/01 - 2/17/01
1/30/01 - 2/09/01

pitas

Have finished watching Angelic Layer, Beautiful Life, and Noir. It was rather intense. o.o And now I'm going to have to babble about my own impressions of each ending, so beware major spoilers for all the series.

Angelic Layer was rather cute. ^_^ (I did tear up a bit, though, when Shuuko and Misaki finally faced each other.) I really liked the final battle; I knew it had to be something big, and slightly more complex than Hikaru, say, shoving Athena out of the Layer. (Miraculously, I managed not to spoil myself on the ending, but I did figure that Hikaru would battle Athena, and win.) The image of Hikaru sprouting wings was pretty powerful, and surprising. Not shocking, really, but pleasantly unexpected.

I'm undecided on the relationships. Koutarou and Tamayo are cute together, but Oujirou and Misaki just seems ... odd, after finding out he was in love with Shuuko. Though this *is* CLAMP, after all -- and I guess the main character's love interest having a crush on her mother isn't as bad as the main character *and* her love interest both having a crush on the same guy, who just so happens to be the main character's older brother's in-the-closet boy toy. XD;; I do wonder how Tamayo and Oujirou get together in the manga, and if I'd prefer that pairing. It's not that I have a real problem with Misaki/Oujirou; but Tamayo/Oujirou is cute without that whiff of Oedipalness. o.o Anyway, I think Icchan and Shuuko are simply adorable. ^_^ Ogata and that technician girl whose name I forget seem to go well together ... so unfortunately, no Icchan/Ogata for me. ^_^;;

And onto Beautiful Life. (Spoilers for Kami-sama Mou Sukoshi Dake included. ^_^;) I cried *so* hard during the last episode. ;___________; I mean, really cried -- I was surprised myself how much I was affected. I admit, I'm a total wussy and will tear up virtually whenever any character onscreen cries; but in the final scene with Shuji and Kyoko, when he's making up her body, I had to choke back sobs so as not to get weird looks from my guy friends. T_^;; It was just so utterly poignant, because you knew Shuji was going to cry eventually, but just not *when*. Kyoko's actual death was rather quiet, and not really surprising, and when Shuji seemed to accept it, you almost believed he'd make it without breaking down. And when he did, it was almost subdued, without any unnecessary dramatics; little things, like Takumi crying as he watched Shuji, and Kyoko's mom saying "So she can walk in heaven," were what really got to me ... "Konya Tsuki no Mieru Oka ni" is going to make me cry now whenever I hear it, like "I For You." ^_^;; It won't be quite as bad, though, because the latter is an angsty song anyway. And Beautiful Life is different. It's a love story, but not really shoujo style; Kami-sama (much as I love it) most certainly *is*. (It's like the uber-shoujo -- it ends with a wedding, a baby, *and* death, all in one. XD;;) So instead of girlish weepiness, BL was more a quiet pain in your chest. In the final scene, though, Shuji with his hair slicked back reminded me loads of Kaneshiro Takeshi. ^_^;

And finally, Noir. At least this one didn't make me cry. ^_^;; What can I say? It was just cool. I could have easily been disappointed with the ending, but I wasn't. (Though I wonder, if I'd followed every bit of the storyline more closely, if I would have found something missing.) I love the way the show started out as a chicks-with-guns action plot, then led to a climax based more on the character relationships than anything else.

What surprised me, though, is how much of a Mireille/Kirika fan I am now. It's the first shoujo ai pairing I really support -- of course, there's always Haruka/Michiru, but I never knew enough about them to be a real follower. The Kirika x Mireille made itself clear in the last half of the series or so, but Mireille x Kirika really came in during the final episodes. Especially (duh) when she was begging Kirika not to kill herself. I figured it was there before, but Mireille has such a closed personality; at first, you think it's Kirika who does, but that's not the case. It's not that she hides her feelings, but that she's such a blank slate, she doesn't *have* them to hide. Whenever she feels something, you know it immediately. Mireille, on the other hand, projects an open heart when the opposite is true, which is rather interesting. I'm toying with the idea of a fic (just a short introspection, nothing major o.o), and was originally going to make it from Kirika's POV, but I realized that Mireille is the more intriguing character. So we'll see. It'd be my first shoujo ai piece, at the least. ^_^v

As for Chloe x Kirika ... I don't really see it. There were definitely hints of UST, especially with their tendency to be naked at the same time, but I don't feel it's in Chloe's character. She's such an innocent (odd, that I'm calling her of all people that ^_^;), her view of love would be as skewed as her view of Noir itself. It seems she looks at Le Grand Retour, not as a ritual to establish her position as a killer and affect an overthrow of Soldats, but just as a chance for her to be with her "family" and make Altena, her "mother," happy. Noir represents the world she knows and is comfortable in, not politics or killing or sin or righteous ideology. So any feelings she has for Kirika become more of child-like, perhaps sisterly devotion, than romantic ones. When she died, there was no evidence of the shock of a betrayed lover. Her last word, after all, was "Noir."

We also watched the first episode of some live-action sentai show ... in which the main characters are some ninja-in-training whose sensei is attacked by the bad guy, and saves himself by using his super-duper magic powers to ... turn himself into a hamster. X_x;; Go Japan.

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 05:08 p.m. on Sunday, March 3, 2002

I've been getting a crapload of hits from searches along the lines of this one. It amuses me. XD I'm just sorry I can't help anyone in their search; I really don't know any good links. Though I wonder why I'm so freaking high on the list of results for that thing, and why people think the entry that shows up promises them what they're looking for. (It's even beaten out the equally irrational chronic attraction I seem to hold for people searching for h3nt4i. XD;;)

In other news, I might be sick. >_< I think I've been holding it off all week, so it's not a big surprise. But I really really want to go to tonight's showing, and I don't know if it might just be better to stay home today so as not to knock myself over the edge. But really, of all the weeks I could miss ... XP Still, I've got a couple of hours. I'll see how it goes. *kicks immune system*

I'm in love with the Elephant Love Song Medley from Moulin Rouge. *_*

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 02:30 p.m. on Saturday, March 2, 2002

I've been forgetting to blog. ^_^; Not like anything interesting has happened lately. I'm currently bracing myself for the endings of Noir, Beautiful Life, and Angelic Layer tomorrow night -- the first of which will probably give me a heart attack in terms of suspense, and the second of which will cause me to dehydrate myself as I blubber like an idiot. T_T And, of course, I'm also waiting for my doujinshi. >o<

I'm (sorta) working on my English assignment -- we have to pick a poem or passage and write three AP-style multiple choice questions on it, one of each "level." My original thought was to use something by Nikolay Gumilyov, because I'm fairly enamored of his love poems. But you know how it is when you like a poem, but you don't totally get it? (Or is this just me? ^^;;) I mean, I get the sense of the poem, but I don't feel comfortable asking questions on it that have a *right* answer (or "best answer," as they say), because it's not like I have that good of an idea what I'm talking about. ^_^; So ... judging by what type of poems they usually have on the exams, I'm going to try a Christina Rossetti one, which produces fewer sparklies but more concrete ideas. :P

Rather boring life I lead, isn't it? XD;; Just wait till I get my doujinshi, and you can see me spazz and sparkly like the nerdish fangirl I am. XD;;

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 10:48 p.m. on Friday, March 1, 2002

I just found out that yesterday was the bicentennial of Victor Hugo's birthday. ^_^ I've been told I have something of an obsession concerning Hugo, but, bah. I really really like his writing. ^_^;;

In other, equally important news, I've determined that, barring unforeseen circumstances, I will receive the doujinshi anywhere from tomorrow to next Wednesday. That's the window I calculated based on the respective shipping methods used by neechan and the seller, and assuming that the books would be shipped off the day after the payment was received. Do I fixate? Nope, not in the slightest. XD;;

Whaaat? I'm just excited, 'sall. :3

I watched the tape of last night's Jay Leno my mom taped. Apolo Anton Ohno -- and hoo boy, did he get screams from the audience. Better watch out, neechan, someone's going to rip that poster right off your door. XD;;

I wish I had more interesting things to talk about, but I don't. _o_;; News about the SakCon transportation issue will be forthcoming, but that's not really interesting to anyone who's not going. ^_^;; I also printed out the next twenty pages of Ashes today; it's halfway done, yay. (The printing, not Ashes. XD;;) But yikes, I am in tunnel-vision mode. Doujinshi. SakCon. Ashes. Repeat. _o_;;

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 06:30 p.m. on Wednesday, February 27, 2002

GRAR!! I think -- rather, I'm holding on to a slim thread of hope that this is not the case, but in any case I'm almost sure -- that all the trains leaving Seattle on Amtrack on April 28 (a.k.a. the last day of Sakura Con) are SOLD OUT. XO This is my own fault, kind of, because while I was correct in my assumption that not everyone was going up to Seattle from Vancouver on April 26 and therefore the trains would not be crowded then, I failed to follow the rest of that brilliant notion to its logical end, and realize that everyone DOES have to leave FROM Seattle, once Sakura Con ends. >_<

*sighsighsigh* One of my friends is calling the train station, just to make sure, but ... I'm not sure what we're going to do. We mightmightMIGHT get business class, though that's both iffy and spendy. Perhaps, if my parents are feeling unbelievably generous, they could pick us up on Sunday? XP

*sigh* Can't dwell. Not productive. But I wonder -- how come this year, when we're actually *planning* everything, everything is in turn fscking up on us? This better not happen with the fic contest. *gnaws lip* I'm doing things on schedule, really -- printed up the entry form and the first ten pages at school today (I'm doing it in installments, so the school won't reprimand me for wasting paper and toner ¬_¬), so I'll be able to send it off on Monday, a good six days before the postmark deadline. I mean, really, what in the name of jeebus can go wrong with that? ... I'm seriously asking, because it seriously will happen.

Still, I'm content. It's rare that I see my work in hard copy (especially my fics), and so it was just a nice warm fuzzy when I held the first ten pages (albeit ten DOUBLE-SPACED pages >_>) of From the Ashes in my hands, crisp and neat. So ... the next fifty pages will be printed over the next few days, and then I will fill out the form, and double-check it, and address the envelope, and triple-check it, and then send it off, and make sure it has enough freaking postage and everything, and it will get there. So there.

Neko-chan, I'm glad your existence has been validated. XD;; I'll read the books as soon as I can, really, because I hunger for prose UST. XD

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 06:24 p.m. on Tuesday, February 26, 2002

Tired. Blah. Feeling seized with that usual sense of Monday overwhelmed-ness. >_< I need something to kick my lazy butt into gear so I can get done all the work I need to. Otherwise I'll waste time reading Alice 19th, mou.

Neechan, your tapes came in from Soyokaze. I think it's a sign how 'jaded' I've become -- a bunch of anime just arrived at my house, and I'm not even excited. ^_^;;

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 06:15 p.m. on Monday, February 25, 2002

Today's trip to Kino's was an exercise in willpower. >_< In the end, I managed to limit myself to the second volume of Alice 19th like I'd said -- but oh, the temptation was there. First of all, there was a new(?) Kiroro best of album, "Kiroro no Uta." Unlike the other Kiroro CDs there, this one had twelve tracks, and I was really tempted -- but I kept reminding myself, "You're getting doujinshi. You're getting doujinshi." ^_^;; Also, all of a sudden it seems that they've decided to restock old stuff, because now they've got RuroKen CDs (under the heading "Samurai X" >_<). All of them. XO Watase Yuu has a new postcard book out, this time with some Alice 19th along with more Imadoki and AyaCere. And Takahashi Rumiko has *three* new ones, all of Inuyasha. And that. Was. Not. All. Because then I looked at the artbook section, and saw the newly stocked Weiß and Gundam Wing artbooks, thinking "It's a good thing I've gotten past that stage where I leapt at every piece of loot that had pretty pictures on it." I mean, I even (with minimal struggle) passed by the Furuba and Yami and even HanaKimi character books (sorry neechan, but it was only a character book after all). But then ...

Me: *picks up book* What's this?
*blinkblink*
Tohru ... Azumi ... "Pieta"?
*shriiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeek*

Of course, this was all in my head -- didn't want to get any weird looks for talking to myself, after all. I had to bite my lip several times to keep from giggling and/or swearing to myself. XD;; But, anyway, I did eventually manage to fight off even the temptation of Tohru Azumi goodness (at least it wasn't a doujinshi artbook like "Love" or "Peace" ... I would have been a goner) and only buy a single tankoubon. Who said I have no self-control? ^_^v;;

Oh, and still no Creamy Choco Pocky. I think they stopped carrying it. And the ice cream mochi was all sold out. Che.

Closing ceremonies of the Olympics tonight! I plan to watch, though I may be doing my Government reading during commercials and stuff. Or reading Alice 19th. But oh, I'm sad. The U.S. lost both the men's and women's hockey gold medal matches. And Apolo ...! T_T It's like he said, though; the predictions of him getting 4 gold medals were absurd because speed-skating is so unpredictable. And I just love his spirit ... He and Michelle Kwan are both so awesome. And the latter was at his races Saturday night, holding a sign saying "Oh Yes Ohno." ^_^

"Indio" from the second Noir soundtrack is quite good. It's a pretty conventional slow vocal, played during episode 21 or 22 when Mireille is trying to find Kirika. Almost like one of those cheesy love songs they play during the requisite angsty montages in romantic-comedy movies ... or at least, that's what I was thinking while I was watching it. ^_^;

... And now I wonder if I'm really going to kick myself for not getting "Pieta." >o<;;

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 05:24 p.m. on Sunday, February 24, 2002

Yawn. Feeling bored and unproductive. ^_^; I'm still rather heartbroken over Michelle Kwan not getting the gold. I could go into a long spiel about everything I think about the scoring (not that I think it was unfair) and Michelle's performance and the medalists and medals themselves, but Michelle herself is being so gracious and not dwelling, so why bother. The fact that she's not blaming anyone -- Sarah, the judges, or even herself -- is impressive. I respect her so very, very immensely, as an athlete and as a person. And, like so many people have been saying, she's already a champion and one of the best American skaters ever. Scott Hamilton really says it well. I wub Scott Hamilton. ^_^

It's too bad I missed the figure skating exhibition last night; I didn't want to watch because I thought it'd make me sad, but Lili-chan said it was good. (I did catch the last bit, with the Russian and Canadian pairs' joint spin. *_*) Neechan is going to see if she can catch it on CNBC or something. In the meantime, my mom is taping Apolo Ohno's races tonight, since I'll be at anime. ^_^

I have a touch of Government reading to do, but ... bah. I'll have time tomorrow -- though we might go to Kino's (Alice 19th, yay!). I've done a little work, and wrote about a page of Ashes 4. Hopefully we'll be able to get past this boring exposition/revelation part soon. ^_~;;

Oh, and I finally got my scores. XD

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 03:11 p.m. on Saturday, February 23, 2002

Still no SAT scores. *growl* Like I said, I'm no longer wondering about my actual scores, but it's getting the actual document -- I found out that my friend got them on Tuesday, and now I'm bothered. But, hey, if this will up my postal service karma and ensure that the money order and doujinshi reach their respective destinations safely, then I'm all for it. XD;; So, yes. Waiting for scores, waiting for dj, waiting for Sakura Con ... These next couple of months are exciting. *^_^*

The Olympics tonight are going to be stressful. XO I don't know how I'm going to keep from passing out holding my breath to get through the women's free skate. ^_^;; I could do what I did last night, when I let Lili-chan tell me what happened with Apolo Ohno, since she saw it two hours before me (otherwise I would have freaked when I thought he got the silver), but ... I kinda want to experience it myself. Heart stress be damned. XD;;

Speaking of Lili-chan -- good job on getting Persian Guy's number! XD Now just give me some of your courage so I can ask a guy to Tolo. >.>

I wrote a bit in Ashes today! ^o^ It was only about half a page, but still. It's progress! (Still don't know what we're going to do about the Sakura Con contest, but ... >_<)

Oh, and go here for -- that's right -- Very Secret Diary T-shirts. XD XD XD I love it. If I could, I would so get this one. XD

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 05:35 p.m. on Thursday, February 21, 2002

Hmph. I'm glad I got my SAT II scores online last night (did better than I'd hoped, though the math was the lowest, go figure) instead of waiting for them to come in the mail, because they were sent out four business days ago and they *still* haven't arrived. XP I want to have the document in my hand so I can be sure they didn't make a mistake, and that yes, I can relax now. >.>

In other news, I'm now obsessed with the Winter Olympics. XD;; Was going to study my Government last night but watched the women's figure skating short program; then got caught up in women's bobsledding and men's aerial freestyle and was a goner. o.o;; It's like one of my friends said today at lunch -- he usually doesn't give a crap about these sports, but give him a few minutes in front of the TV and before you know it he's cheering madly for the U.S. curling team. XD;; Tonight I'm going to try to catch Apolo Ohno's (who does look like a j-rocker! XD) 1500m speedskate, because I'm sad I missed his last one. (I'm still amazed he's even competing -- I don't care how "minor" an injury is; if it takes stitches to fix I would not go. O_o;;) Then Thursday is the women's figure skating final ... Ooh, I'm so nervous for Michelle Kwan! >o<;; She should be fine, though; she seems to work well under pressure. After the results of the short program (Kwan, Slutskaya, Cohen, Hughes, Butyrskaya), the commentators said there was a possibility of an American sweep, but I doubt it. Sarah Hughes is good, but I don't think she can beat Irina Slutskaya (Sasha Cohen, maybe?). But I will firmly believe in Michelle! XO

There was a funny commercial on last night -- in a car factory, the machines started moving of their own accord, and one of the paint machines sprayed "SUKI" onto the side of one of the cars. The overseer was watching, and was like, "Sucky?" And then you saw a little Japanese girl at her computer, and her mom called "Suki!" For some reason, it utterly tickled me and neechan. XD;;

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 05:38 p.m. on Wednesday, February 20, 2002

Feeling bored. And antsy. o.o;

It's not often that I'm anxiously awaiting something in the mail, but I am right now. Now obviously the doujinshi won't be getting here for a while yet (though two weeks is a lot less than I'd originally been expecting), but my SAT II scores are supposed to be arriving Very Soon. I'm sorta nervous. I'm constantly reminded of the fact that Writing, the test that I felt rather iffy on, is the only one Whitman cares about. >_O Guu ...

... Yet at the same time, I strangely enjoy the sensation. It's kind of like waiting for Christmas. XD;;

Watched eps. 1-4 of Niea_7 last night (with my mom, wouldn't ya know). It was ... odd. I think you sorta have to be in the mood for that kind of show. ^_^;; Miyamura Yuko played Niea, which I find sorta fitting.

Mou! Neechan and I were planning to submit Ashes to the Sakura Con fanfic contest, but the page limit on the Novel division (the largest one) is fifty pages. DOUBLE-SPACED. X_x The current count (not counting the bit of chapter 4 we've started)? Sixty-one. *twitch* Neechan and I already decided against excerpts-and-summaries, because even though not much "happens" in, say, chapter 3, it's really important later. For character development, at least -- and yes that's important. ¬_¬ So ... I dunno. The rules state that if an entry is over 50 pages, they'll just read the first 50, or more, if they have time; but either way there won't be penalties. I'm leaning toward that option, because I don't want to butcher our baby. T_T

Need to make myself useful. But I'm feeling too nervous and generally twitchy to do anything productive. XP

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 05:57 p.m. on Tuesday, February 19, 2002

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!

Guess who just won four -- count 'em, four! -- AoMisao doujinshi?? XD XD XD Two by P.P.P. Press, one by Himawarigaoka, and one by K&K World! ^________________^*

Neechan, forget what I said about the Kiroro CD. It feels like I'm getting too many good things at once. XD;; "Overload ... pleasure overload ...!" And, have I told you lately that you're an awesome oneechan? *nadenade*

*random dancing*

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 06:47 p.m. on Monday, February 18, 2002

I should probably have stuff to blog about, but I, um, don't. ^_^; Not much, anyway. We did visit neechan yesterday, which was fun -- got green tea ice cream mochi at Uwajimaya, but it melted in the car. T_T

I feel so unproductive. I didn't have much homework this weekend, and it feels like in four days I should have accomplished ... well, everything. ^_^;; And I know I did the fic on Thursday, but ... See, this is my problem. When I have things to do, I worry about not getting it all done; when I don't, I worry about not having something to do. _o_;; Maa. I'll do my RKRC nominations today (all two of them), and probably get more KareKano watched. And Niea_7. And maybe I'll even kick my lazy butt into gear and work on Ashes 4.

No one seems to be blogging this weekend. Is everyone on exciting holiday trips but me? ^_^;

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai ~~ 03:04 p.m. on Monday, February 18, 2002